It’s December 27th, 2020. The Christmas Season is lackluaster, at best. I’ve worked desperately to clear my heart of the noise and stress this year has cast over me/us, but the energy is different. The silence in the world is deafening right now. There is a stagnant feeling of gloom.
On Christmas Eve, it took a major dose of gumption to get out of the bed and create the misfit Christmas that I make with my friends. You see, my family Christmases ended years ago after the passing of all the people I was close to in my “family” circle. It wasn’t big to begin with, but within a 22 month span, the people that I’d spent most of my Christmas Eve’s with during my growing years all passed to a new place.
Learning how to deal with Christmas and any family holiday has been a challenge I’ve accepted and worked through to find true joy. I cook for two days, make special dishes, play the old cartoons that give a simple nod to the soul, like Rudolph and Charlie Brown. I create sentimental spaces with lights and candles – the music is like being a seven year old child again, whispers of excitement, comfort and magic. As you get older and your circle becomes decreased, you find ways to create joy. However, this year was sterile.
In no way would I pretend that I didn’t feel the real spirit of the season. While it all felt so odd & cold, there were moments of pure clarity in which my soul took charge. I’ve shed tears as I watch daytime talk shows, witnessing authenticity & a real sense of the people who are trying to make a positive place in this world. For example, as I watched Rachel Ray on Christmas Eve, I sobbed. She lost her home this year during the California wildfires, along with Covid & losing a special pet. She had so many letters and objects that had been sent to her…… people that just wanted to let her family know they cared and knew what she was going through. But, her gratitude was radiant through her humility. You could feel how much appreciation she had for those who reached out & handed her a band-aid during her most difficult time.
Little moments, simple, thoughtful and heartfelt. The gems of what Christmas means the most. Generally, everyone is raging through the streets, rushing through stores, racking up their credit card debt & losing sight of what the season truly represents. While I didn’t feel the “joy” or “inspiration” of Christmas because I know there are millions of hurting people – everywhere, I did witness the comfort of how you can really ‘feel’ that we are all going through all this together. When I have a moment of “oooh, i’m sooo cozy”, my mind will jump & realize how many people are NOT cozy. There are people who don’t know how they’re going to make it through the evening – maybe where they’ll sleep, if they’ll be warm, if they’ll get a small meal to push out the growl in their belly. We have so much to be thankful for, but we have plenty we complain about right now. So many are hurting and it’s time for ALL of us to turn on our heart light & start glowing everywhere we go. People need a smile, a helping hand or a quick cut in front of the line. Let them do it. But, when it’s time to be quiet & reboot your spirt, shut out the noise, turn away from social media, the news and anything that can instantly send your nerves to the dark side. Find a spiritual escape through classical music or classic jazz…… something that can shut out the reality on the outside. Music can heal you & change a mood very quickly and with ease.
I guess we’ll get through this. It’s one obstacle. Every challenge strengthens us, making us sharper for the next set of circumstances. No matter how far down we get, we must remember to be vigilant in picking each other back UP, being consistent in remembering who holds the key to your heart. Say you’re thankful. Say so. Everyday.
